Bad Hair Day at the License Bureau

This story does not begin at the Driver License Bureau. It begins a few days before that, a few days earlier when I could not stand the bangs wisping all over my eyes, covering them. I chopped them off. I exercised no finesse, thinking only that I wished to see, I wished to be free. I even chopped the sides and had my daughter cut the back.

When the hair stopped flying, I looked in the mirror. "Oh, no," I said. "Jack and the Beanstalk."

"More like Willie Wonka," my daughter said. This would be the Johnny Depp version.

In the days following, I had to use my license a couple of times at the bank, only to be reminded that it was expired. Expired? Why those incompetents at the DMV!* I renewed by mail in January! I now realized I'd never received it. After several phone calls, it came down to this: I had to go in, stand for hours in line, and replace it.

So I did. And lucky me, after I settled in for the wait, a lady said if anyone was just replacing their license, they should leave the waiting area, bypass the line, and head to the counter. WOOHOO!

Then she told me to step up to the camera. SNAP! OH NO! I'm Jack and the Beanstalk for the next six years. Of course, I decided right then and there to not get any tickets for six years. And to always pay cash.

It was later, when I was in my room, I remembered I'd once written myself a note on the back of an unopened letter, sometime in January. The note's been sitting under my curling iron since then.

I leaped up, snatched the envelope, and tore it open. There, in full glory, was my renewed license, with the old, much more presentable picture.

Oh, happy day!

*my apologies!

10 comments:

Sandy Nawrot said...

The hair gods were smiling over you today! Now go cut that other one up into six pieces! I, on the other hand, have been cursed. I pray the day mine expires because I have a hairdo that looks like one of my kids put a bowl over my head and cut it. My hairdresser happened to see this photo at my last appointment and about had a coronary. She said "did I give you that cut?". To tell truth, I'm not sure who to blame.

Charles Gramlich said...

I trim my bangs myself all the time. But I guess you could tell that.

Susan Sandmore said...

You're not going to show us the picture? Wahhh!

Kim Kasch said...

But I love Willie Wonka and Johnny Depp. ;)

Chris Eldin said...

AHHAAHH!
By coincidence, I have a picture of hair on my blog today. I think it's what you should aspire to, if you can....
;-)

Mary Witzl said...

What a great story, and yours, unlike mine, had a happy ending. I looked like a hellish thing in my driving license photo -- half chipmunk, half drooling idiot. I still shiver when I have to take it out and show it.

Sheri said...

OMG, that is so something I would do! All of it. From the haircutting, to the license renewing, to remembering that I did get my license back after all!

We must be kindred spirits

courtney summers said...

Hee! All's well that definitely ends well, in this case. :)

sharigreen said...

Ahaha, great post, Danette! :D

Cheryl said...

Hahahaha,I too did that recently. I realized (on my birthday - after being sick and NOT washing my hair that day) that this was the day of the expiration. Knowing my own sad state of luck, I put my hair in a ponytail, donned zero make-up, and rushed to MV for a license renewal, thinking they just wanted my money, my old pic would suffice. of course, no such luck. I was horrified, but wanted to hightail it out of there, bad pic and all. No use not smiling for the wondrous occasion. Oh well, there's always a better photo-op!!! By the way LOVE your blog, am having fun reading it!!!!!