Middle Grade Authors

I have joined a secret society of middle-grade authors. While you are watching The Hills, we are meeting in the basement of cyberspace, plotting our dominance in the blogosphere. We are authors and illustrators and miscellaneous others. We will interview, review, and discuss, and we want you in our world. Even now, we make plans for topics you cannot ignore.

As of yet, we are unnamed, but make no mistake--we plan to take over the world.

Resistance is futile.

American Idol Rolling Stones Night--HOT!

He's young! He's hot! He's fresh!

Last night was Rolling Stones night on American Idol and Adam Lambert rocked the house with "Satisfaction," leaving most of us in shock on our couches, desperate for more.

Oh, wait--that was last year, when American Idol was exciting.

I've been told to let go of Adam, whom I compare every AI contestant with and find them lacking. Adam is so last year, someone has told me. Well, sorry! I just remember the days of my youth, last year, which was my first year watching American Idol, and I can't help but recall how pumped up I felt after each of Adam's performances (and sometimes Allison's). He was hot energy delivered via satellite. I pumped my fist, I sang along, I voted--if I'd had a lighter, I would have flicked it.

The next morning I would wake, watching Adam prance across the inside of my eyelids. I couldn't wait to get started on my day. People with tremendous gifts inspire me in my writing, even if what they do resembles nothing I punch out on the keyboard. It's seeing them wrench their gift to its fullest that sets me on fire. A night after Adam and I'd hammer out three days' of writing in two hours.

I opened an iTunes account because of Adam. And that's the standard I am now setting my voting by--will I pay to download this song? No, not really.

Forgetting Adam (ha! Like I ever will!), here are the people I like best: Crystal Bowersox. I bet if you traced her family tree, you'd find Janis Joplin hanging off a branch. Casey James. He's got that cool raspy voice I love, and he's the only guy singing upbeat songs. AI contestants--I have my own problems, please don't bring me down in song.

And now for AI contestants only--SUMMER FRIEND'S TIPS FOR WINNING AMERICAN IDOL:

* If you are a guy, wear a wallet chain.
* Five o'clock shadow always looks good. (Must be 18 or over for this tip.)
* If you can't dance, don't. (You know who you are.)
* Clip your nails. (Again, you know who you are.)
* If you are a girl, wear weird combos like cocktail dresses and combat boots.
* Be quirky, but not goofy. (A fine line there--I submit for proof Megan Joy flapping her arms like a bird, to much mockery from the judges.)
* Don't be 16.

And the most important thing of all:
Have a moment. Please review all Adam Lambert cuts for this.

Adam Lambert — Satisfaction Video - Watch more Videos at Vodpod.

Get your big pants on! It'sHammyTime!